Updated: Dec 9, 2021
I don’t know why I captured the same scene repeatedly. The same river, different times of day, in different light and shades. Maybe it kept me from drowning myself in that river. Again.
I feel like water solves all problems. Thirsty? Drink water. Dirty? Cleanse with water. Tired of a person? Drown them.
When I was a kid, the first thing I did after school was to immerse myself in this river. Every single day. It’s a natural thing to me. Now looking back, it’s like a kind of spiritual ritual to wash away all the shit I had learned, all the bullies I had experienced at school in the early part of the day. Let the river take them, drown them.
One day, I jumped in and instead of seeing myself ascending back onto the surface, there’s only a stream of tinted pink water diluted and faded away. The blood was from a deep gash in my foot after crashing so hard on the surface that I landed on a sharp piece of broken glass at the bottom of the river.
I quite like that scene.